Thursday, November 26, 2009

Skottel braai se gat!

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Our previous Top 10 inventions in SA include the G5 Cannon, the Addo elephant-proof fence, the harbour-protecting Dolosse, the Rooi Valk chopper and, of course, the koeksuster - but all these things pale completely into insignificance by comparison, to what you are about to behold.  

Men, trust me on this.  This is the ultimate thing you didn't know you needed, until you just saw it and have unbelievably lived without for so long...!!  

And if you're a proper braai man, well, then this is definitely for you...!!



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Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Curry

 

 

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Desserts

 

 

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Microwave

 

 

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Bar one Recipes

 

 

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KFC

 

 

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Breads

 

 

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Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Mag jy

 

    MAG JY...

      - Nooit omdraai wanneer jy teleurgestel word nie.
      - nooit ophou wanneer jy verloor het nie.
      - nooit bly lê wanneer jy geval het nie.
      - nooit haat wanneer jy seer gekry het nie.
      - nooit minderwaardig voel wanneer jy nie waardeer word nie.
      - nooit hoogmoedig word wanneer jy presteer het nie.
      - nooit rus wanneer jy voorspoed gevind het nie.
      - nooit in die steek laat wanneer jy vertrou word nie.

       MAG JY..

        - Altyd lewe met die wete dat jy met 'n doel lewe.
        - altyd ly in die geloof sodat lyding krag bring.
        - altyd doen met die besef dat dit jou taak is.
        - altyd gee en deur jou gawe verryk word.
        - altyd gereelmagtigheid en ondersteuning kry.
        - altyd lewe met die oog op die onsienlike.  

       MAG JY...
         Een wonderlike dag he.

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Bath and Body Recipes

 

 

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As jy jou kind moet groet?



Ongelooflike getuienis...

AS JY JOU KIND MOET GROET

'n Paar jaar na my twee seuns se geboorte het ek, elke nou en dan 'n
gedagte gekry dat ek een van my kinders gaan verpleeg op 'n siek bed.
Ek kon nie sê watter seun dit gaan wees nie, maar die gedagte het
gereeld by my opgekom.

Jaundre is in Desember 2006 gediagnoseer met kanker. Ons moes die dag
van diagnose onmiddelik Kaapstad to gaan vir behandeling by Rooi-Kruis
Kinder hospital. Die behandeling was intensief, maar hy het goed
gereageer daarop ten spyte van al die newe-effete van chemoterapie.
Binne 10 dae was die 6cm tumor wat op sy borsbeen was feitlik weg. Die
dokters was baie positief. Na omtrent 'n maand is Jaundre ontslaan om
sy behandeling voort te sit in PE. Alles het goed verloop en ons het
met die Junie maand skool vakansie terug gegaan Rooi Kruis hospitaal
toe vir 'n opvolg ondersoek. Weereens het die spesialiste ons verseker
alles verloop volgens plan. Ons was in daardie tyd 24 uur van die dag
op ons kneë om te smeek vir genade en ook daarna om dankie te sê vir
Sy genade wat ons ontvang het. Ek het gereken die gedagte wat ek so
gereeld gekry het, is die kanker en dat dit nou sal weggaan, maar dit
het nie ek het dit nogsteeds gekry.

Vanaf omtrent September 2007 het Jaundre vir my gevra "hoe lank gaan
hy nog by ons wees"? Ek het aangeneem dit is die kanker wat hy gehad
het wat hom hierdie idees gee. Einde November 2007 het ons besluit om
te gaan kamp vir 'n naweek, want altwee seuns geniet dit by die see.
Jaundre het begin kla dat sy hartjie vinnig klop. Ons het hom die
Maandag more dokter toe gevat en nie in die aand soos die gewoonte was
nie. Die dokter het bloed toetse gedoen wat alles normal gewys het. Hy
is toe verwys na die x-straal afdeling. Die middag het ek die
spesialis gebel om die uitslae te kry, maar moes toe verneem dat die
kanker terug is en dat die tumor 9cm is wat groei op sy borsbeen. Ons
moes onmiddelik terug Kaapstad toe gaan. Vandat ons daar gekom het was
die dokters meer negatief oor genesing as positief. Hy het met meer
intensiewe behandeling begin en sy liggaampie was heeltemal afgetakel.

Teen die 24ste Desember het die dokters vir ons gesê om huis toe te
kom want ons is besig om die stryd te verloor, maar hoe op aarde
vertel jy vir 'n 12 jarige seun wat by sy volle positiewe is dat hy
besig is om dood te gaan? Ek kon dit nie doen nie. Daar was een chemo
tipe wat oorgebly het maar die dokters het dit nie aanbeveel nie omdat
dit so sterk is en hy sou dood gaan van die newe effekte en nie die
siekte nie. Ek het gevra dat hulle daarmee begin. Na die eerste week
van behandeling waarin hy geen newe effekte gekry het nie, moes hy 3
weke wag voordat hy weer kon begin om sy gesonde selle tyd te gee om
te herstel. Hy het intussen begin kla van rugpyn en seer bene. Vrydag
die 25ste Januarie 2008 het die dokter ons meegedeel dat die kanker
verder versprei het na die beenmurg toe en dat ons liewer moet huis
toe gaan, medies gesproke kan hulle niks meer doen nie. Ons moes vir
hom die nuus gaan oordra.

Vandat Jaundre gediagnoseer was het hy met niks n keuse gehad nie, nie
met die diagnose nie, nie met die behandeling nie, en nou ook nie met
die dood nie. Ek het vir hom gesê die Here sal hom eers gaan wys hoe
dit in die Hemel is en dan kan hy besluit of hy daarheen wou gaan of
liewer by ons bly. Ons het die Here gesmeek vir daardie voorreg, want
ek kon nie my kind net so laat gaan met sy onsekerheid nie. Hy wou
weet as hy sou kies om liewer by ons te bly, of hy dan nog gaan siek
wees of gesond. Ek GLO die Here sou hom vir my gesond terug gegee het
as dit SY wil was.

Ons het met die Here geredineer, geargumenteer, gesmeek, maar sy wil
was om my seun hemel toe te neem. Die spesialiste het ons n maand saam
met ons seun gegee, maar ons het net een goue week gehad. Ons het elke
nag gelê en gesels. Saterdag oggend net na 10h00 is hy oorlede, maar
sekondes voor sy dood het dit gelyk asof hy uit die bed uit wou klim,
hy het sy nek gedraai en vas gestaar teen n spesifieke punt teen die
muur, weer na my gekyk en vir my gesê "Ek is lief vir jou mamma, maar
DIS LEKKER DAAR"!

Ek glo die Here het vir my kind gaan wys waarheen hy hom gaan neem en
dat Jaundre vir die eerste keer self kon besluit of hy na daardie
"LEKKER" plek wou gaan en of hy na my toe terug wou kom. Hy het die
Hemel gekies. Daarvoor loof en prys ons die Here.

Die Woensdagaand na die roudiens het ek gaan slaap, ek het nie Bybel
gelees of gebid nie, dit was asof ek dood was van binne ek kon net
niks doen nie. Jaundre en ek het altyd gespot omdat my hare so
vreeslik uitgeval het. Hy het altyd gesê ek gaan voor hom bles wees,
en dan sy hande deur my hare getrek en my in my nek gesoen. Daardie
nag het ek wakker geskrik (Geestelik wakker) van n handjie in my hare
en n koel soentjie in my nek. Ek het onmiddelik geweet Jaundre is by
my. Ek kon aanvoel dat hy haastig was. Ons het gesels, en hy het onder
andere vir my gese "die OOM" het die pypie in sy bors uitgehaal en dit
was glad nie seer nie. Ons het hom veras met pypie en al (chemoterapie
drippie in sy hoofslagaar ) Ek GLO die Here het daardie pypie
uitgehaal, want niemand anders het nie. Hy het na n rukkie vir my gesê
hy moet nou gaan. Hy het omgedraai en geloop asof van nêrens was daar
skielik n tweede persoon by hom, wat ek net van agteraf gesien het.
Daardie persoon het my kind se hand gevat en weggeloop, maar ek WEET
hy is gelukkig en dat hy graag wil teruggaan waarvandaan hy gekom het.

Ons kan die Here nie genoeg loof vir daardie versekering nie. Die
gemoedsrus is onbeskryflik. So twee weke na die gebeurtenis het ek
weer met die Here gepraat en vir hom gevra hy moet Jaundre net weer
vir my wys, ek het berusting waar hy is, maar ek verlang so
verskriklik baie. Daardie nag het ek "gedroom" ek sien twee hande in
een gevou. Uit die lug het 'n bak "kruik" geval. Die hande het dit
gevang en 'n stem het vir my gesê, "Soos daardie paar hande die kruik
gevang het, so vang die Here sy kinders, as jy in Sy hande is kan NIKS
jou daaruit kry nie, jy kan nie jou seun nou al sien nie, daar is te
veel siele op die aarde wat nie reg is nie, MAAK DIT REG!"

Dit is waarom hierdie getuienis uitgestuur word na so veel as moontlik
mense, want ons moet seker maak ons siele is reg vir die Here. Daar IS
n HEMEL, maar daar IS ook n hel. Moet nie wag tot more nie, dit kan te
laat wees. Die Hemel en Hel het nie n ouderdoms groep beperking vir
bejaardes alleen nie.

Neem 'n oomblik en neem Jesus aan as jou verlosser en saligmaker.

GEBED Dankie Vader dat U U Seun gestuur het om vir my sondes aan die kruis te sterf. Jesus, neem asseblief my bede na die Vader. In Jesus Naam, Amen.

 

 

 

 


Spleek Cleeyarley

 





THINGS THAT ARE DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:
1. Innovative
2. Preliminary
3. Proliferation
4. Cinnamon


THINGS THAT ARE VERY DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:

1. Specificity
2. Anti-constitutionalists
3. Passive-aggressive disorder
4. Transubstantiation

 

THINGS THAT ARE DOWN RIGHT IMPOSSIBLE
TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:
1. No thanks, I'm married.
2. Nope, no more booze for me thanks!
3. Sorry, but you're not really my type.
4. Kebab? No thanks, I'm not hungry.
5. Good evening officer, Isn't it lovely out tonight?
6. Oh no, I couldn't. I'm tone deafa and nobody wants to hear me sing karaoke tonight.
7. I'm just not interested in fighting you!
8. Thank you, but I won't make any attempt to dance as I have no co
- ordination. I'd hate to make myself look a complete idiot!  
9. I really must be going home now, Ive had a few drinks and have to go to work in the morning.



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Let's travel to Cuba

 

 

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Monday, November 23, 2009

Lappieskombers

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


Don't talk and drive

video

 

 

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Cell phone danger

video

 

 

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Just drive

video

How to Catch a Snake...African Style

 

 

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Single black female


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Single Black Female
This has to be one of the best singles ads ever printed.  It is reported to have been listed in the Johannesburg Times.


SINGLE BLACK FEMALE seeks male companionship, ethnicity unimportant. 
 I'm a very good girl who LOVES

to play.  I love long walks in the woods, riding in your bakkie, hunting, camping and fishing trips, cozy winter nights

lying by the fire.  Candlelight dinners will have me eating out of your hand.  I'll be at the front door when you get

home from work, wearing only what nature gave me...  

Call (011)885-6420 and ask for Annie, I'll be waiting.....

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 



Over 150 men found themselves talking to the SPCA

 

 

 

If you don't pass this along, a dog will come out and pee on your keyboard

 

 

 

 

 

 
 
 

 

 

Gotta Love Barry Hilton..........



Don't you just love Barry Hilton. Always knows just how to make you laugh and forget that life sucks.



1. I was so poor growing up… if I wasn't a boy… I'd have had nothing to play with.

2. A girl phoned me the other day & said, "Come on over; nobody's home." I went over. Nobody was home.

3. During sex, my girlfriend always wants to talk to me. Just the other night she called me from a hotel.

4.. One day I came home early from work… I saw a guy jogging naked. I said to the guy, "Hey buddy, why are you doing that?" He said "Because you came home early".

5. It's been a rough day. I got up this morning… put a shirt on & a button fell off. I picked up my briefcase, & the handle came off. I'm afraid to go to the bathroom.

6. I was such an ugly kid… When I played in the sandbox, the cat kept covering me up.

7. I could tell my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster & radio.

8. I was such an ugly baby… My mother never breast fed me. She told me that she only liked me as a friend.

9. I'm so ugly… My father carries around a picture of the kid who came with his wallet.

10.. When I was born, the doctor came into the waiting room & said to my father, "I'm sorry. We did everything we could, but he pulled through."

11. I'm so ugly… my mother had morning sickness… AFTER I was born.

12. I remember the time that I was kidnapped & they sent a piece of my finger to my father. He said he wanted more proof.

13. Once when I was lost, I saw a policeman, & asked him to help me find my parents. I said to him, "Do you think we'll ever find them?" He said, "I don't know kid. There's so many places they can hide."

14. My wife made me join a bridge club. I jump off next Tuesday.

15. I'm so ugly… I worked in a pet shop, & people kept asking how big I'd get.

16. I went to see my doctor. "Doctor, every morning when I get up & I look in the mirror… I feel like throwing up; what's wrong with me?" He said… "I don't know but your eyesight is perfect."

17. I went to the doctor because I'd swallowed a bottle of sleeping pills. My doctor told me to have a few drinks & get some rest.

18. With my old man I got no respect. I asked him, "How can I get my kite in the air?" He told me to run off a cliff.

19. Some dog I got. We call him Egypt because in every room he leaves a pyramid. His favourite bone is my arm. Last night he went on the paper 4 times - 3 of those times I was reading it.

20. One year they wanted to make me poster boy - for birth control.

21. My uncle's dying wish was to have me sitting in his lap; he was in the electric chair.

Mosterdsous



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__._,_.___

Chicken Recipes

 

 

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XCentric Ideas

Cooking with Cross and Blackwell (Mayonaise)

Friday, November 20, 2009

How to measure butter

 

 

 

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Blessed are the cracked.

 

 

Blessed are the cracked, for they let in the light!

TWENTY NINE LINES TO MAKE YOU SMILE

1..
My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought he was God and I didn't.
2..
I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.
3..
Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them.
4..
I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.
5.. Don't take life too seriously; No one gets out alive.

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6.. You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me
7..
Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
8..
Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.

Blessed are the cracked_www.eposvriende.com002.jpg


9.. I'm not a complete idiot -- Some parts are just missing.
10....
Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.

11.. NyQuil, the stuffy, sneezy, why-the-heck-is-the-room-spinning medicine.
12.. God must love stupid people; He made so many.
13..
The gene pool could use a little chlorine.
14..
Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.
15.. Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?

Blessed are the cracked_www.eposvriende.com003.jpg


16.. Being 'over the hill' is much better than being under it!
17.. Wrinkled Was Not One of the Things I Wanted to Be When I Grew up.
18
. Procrastinate Now!

Blessed are the cracked_www.eposvriende.com004.jpg


19..
I Have a Degree in Liberal Arts; Do You Want chips With That?
20..
A hangover is the wrath of grapes.
21..
A journey of a thousand miles begins with a loan from the bank.
22.. Stupidity is not a handicap. Park elsewhere!
23..
They call it PMS because Mad Cow Disease was already taken.
24
.. He who dies with the most toys is nonetheless DEAD.
25.. A picture is worth a thousand words, but it uses up three thousand times the memory.

26.. Ham and eggs...A day's work for a chicken,plus a lifetime commitment for a pig.
27..
The trouble with life is there's no background music.

              And the best one of them all....................
      29..
I smile because I don't know what the heck is going on.

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