1. When you are sad, I will jump on the person who made you sad like a spider monkey jacked up on Mountain Dew!
2. When you are blue, I will try to dislodge whatever is choking you.
3. When you smile, I will know you are plotting something that I must be involved in.
4. When you're scared, we will high-tail it out of here.
5. When you are worried, I will tell you horrible stories about how much worse it could be until you quit whining, ya big baby!
6. When you are confused, I will use little words.
7. When you are sick, stay away from me until you are well again. I don't want whatever you have.
8. When you fall, I'll pick you up and dust you off-- After I laugh my behind off!
This is my oath. I pledge it to the end.
'Why?' you may ask; because you're my FRIEND!